Wednesday, January 19, 2005 – 10:57 pm
Travis: 1, Cancer: 0
It took exactly one year and twelve days, but at least for now it’s over. My scan is clean other than the small mass we’ve known about since my second scan in July. With those results in hand my doctors have finally declared that I am in full Remission, and there is no immediate threat to me in any way.
It still hasn’t hit me yet. I don’t “feel” any different than I have for months. I suppose it’s going to take some getting used to—being able to look at people on the street and not be envious of their healthy ignorance towards this horrible affliction. I feel distanced from the rest of the Cancer world, at least a small fraction anyway.
Now I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and continue unabated through this ol’ thing we like to call Life. New house, new furniture, new outlook on just about everything. It’s difficult for me, as an existentialist, to really dissect what I’m feeling right now. I’m very much beside myself with astonishment and—more importantly—relief. Perhaps in time I’ll do a few happy dances and maybe I’ll even smile once or twice. Who knows. I may even save the World.